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Sunday, January 8, 2012

Resolving

Today I'm joining Urban Muser for the first of a year long selfie project and My 3 Boybarians for a Project 52 where the first week's prompt is/was "resolution".


In The Picture

project 52 p52 weekly photo challenge my3boybarians.com

Window Shopping BW
Window Shopping


Resolution. 
 I've been watching, reading, noticing, noting, listening to the resolutions, the one words, the fresh starts, the 366s, the promises, the resolve, yes there's the word "resolve"
(re-solve does that = resolving something that was already solved?)
and I'm not buying in.  Not jumping in.  Not thinking about it in terms of myself.  I'm not making any new beginnings or resolutions.  I'm a stinker.  Really though, if you met me in person, you'd like me.  I'm not so bad.

I used to teach.  I had more than 600 students annually. Because I taught music, I taught the entire school population.  At the beginning of the year I'd go over the class rules, the expectations, what I would and would not tolerate, my line in the sand.  It worked.  But the itching would start about this time of year-February-ish-and they'd push up against the line, cross it, piss me off.

So.....we'd have "a little talk".  I'm incredibly good at having talks with 7 years olds.  And I'd say I didn't like what was happening, I didn't like going home grouchy, I didn't like having less fun, stopping the games, etc.  And we'd re-evaluate and re-solve and start fresh.  And it worked.

Any day, any time, any reason can be a fresh start, an opportunity for change.
I did a 365 and began it on August 26th.  I completed it too.  Jus' sayin'.
I quit smoking on the smoke out day many many Novembers ago.  I just decided it was time, and I did it.
Late June this past year I decided it was time to start going to the gym regularly; I'm still going.


I put a lot of pressure on myself.  Too much.  I beat myself up when I don't measure up to my high standards.  I don't need a resolution to add more pressure.  I'm working to lessen the pressure, embrace the abstract, let the vacuuming go another day, color outside the lines, sit and be with me and be OK with that.  It's ongoing.  I'm not resolving; I'm continually trying to solve it for the first time.  Yikes.

I'm even a little uncomfortable that these linkies begin at the start of the year-but these are someone else's challenges to themselves and they've invited others along.  If I stay on the bandwagon-yay, and if I fall off, it's OK.  I didn't "start" it or promise to do it.  It just seems like something fun, and I'm always grateful for fun and to anyone who will start it.

Hair in Distress {sh 30}
Hair in Distress

So if I resolve to be resolute it will be if/when I'm ready.  I am a stinker.

Both of these selfies were from late 2011. Maybe that's cheating, but I don't care. It's a starting place.


In the spirit of FULL disclosure-and I am disclosing to myself, (because isn't that what we do on blogs....talk to ourselves and hope someone else hears?) I am challenging myself to a new kind of "Susan" styled 365.  I've been trying to come up with what I wanted to do since this fall and it's finally gelled.  I am doing a 7/52.  That's pumping out 7 good shots/or new edits a week for a year.  Just so happens that my desire to challenge or change falls at the start of the year.  I think it's just a brain thing....easier to keep track of that way.  See I am a stinker. 

17 comments:

urban muser said...

it's not cheating to post selfies from 2011--wherever you want to start is great! so glad you are joining {in the picture}. the number of self-portraits you take is totally up to you--i hope you can stick with it :)

Carol Blackburn said...

Good luck with your new challenge, Susan. I can't wait to see what you post.

Mira said...

Your posts always make me smile. Keep up with great work!

Kathy said...

Haha...love that "hair in distress" photo. You always put a smile on my face, and for THAT...I thank you :). Can't wait to see what the self portrait project brings our way.

Kathy Blackburn

(I put my last name because I see there is another "blackburn' two posts up from mine!)

martinealison said...

Il est toujours bon d'avoir des projets... J'ai h√Ęte de voir la suite... Gros bisous

Ms. Becky said...

Yay!!! Glad you're doing the {in the picture} thing. and I love your 'tude about re-solve/solutions. I'm not selecting a word either. Not going to do it. You call yourself a stinker. I think you're a wise stinker. You know what you need, what works for you, and you choose to do whatever that is in your own good time. now that's something truly admirable. and I love your selfies.

seabluelee said...

Well, I have met you in person, and I do like you. Truly, you are not so bad for a self-described stinker. I admit I have picked a word for this year, as I have for the past few...but it usually turns out to be a description (prediction?) of things that happen to me rather than things I deliberately make happen. Maybe that's just coincidence. But I'd better be careful what word I choose! Love the selfies...but I'm having trouble seeing the bad in the Bad Hair Day.
PS - I'm doing {in the picture} too, and it's HARD already.

Kay L. Davies said...

I really admire people like you, who are willing to try something I wouldn't want to do. There are enough pictures of me in the world and in cyberspace already.
Looking forward to yours, though, because your selfies are so creative and all your photos so beautiful.
K

Leanne said...

I'm doing the selfie thing too! I totally get what your saying about resolutions and choosing a word etc. I agree anytime can be good for choosing to start something.

Anna Lear said...

I always enjoy pausing from my own inner madness to view your posts, and this one warrants a long pause and also a big Thank You. What a thought: put *fewer* restrictions on ourselves... It's a great way to kick off a new year for sure.

lisa said...

Susan, this is surely one of the most enjoyable "New Year's" posts that I've read. I really, really liked it, and I absolutely love the second selfie here!
What a sweetheart you are, and I am so glad you are here!

Brenda said...

Susan,
I so greatly admire your ability to find the position that works for you, regardless of which direction the world may be moving. I keep feeling myself being pulled into the "selfie" project but haven't gotten up the courage yet. I didn't make any resolutions but I did pick a word for 2012 - EXPLORE. I agree with you that one can make a change at anytime in the year - that there is nothing inherently magical about January 1. But it is a convenient place to start. I look forward to your witnessing what this year will bring.

Woody said...

I'm with you, I never create 'New Years Resolutions', so you have company in the 'stinker' corner :-)

I don't have much hair, so you can't tell if it's in distress. That is such a great shot, BTW!

Francisca said...

It never fails to tickle me what others don't like about their own appearance; it's most often something no one else notices. Bad hair? Where? LOL!

It would appear we have something in common: rule breakers. Not the kind of rules that make life easier, like traffic lights (although I've been known to run a red light or ten when no one is around), but the self-imposed, what on earth would it matter, no one gets hurt, kind of rules. You're no stinker in my eyes. There were no NY resolutions made by me, either. When I commit, I commit and make it happen. When I'm not sure I realistically can, I don't. I've signed up for the selfie project, too, but I set no number, as my travels are too unpredictable and I may need to spend weeks or even months this year behind the Great Firewall of China that blocks my access to social media, including blogs. But I am working on setting up a separate blog for this project. You're off to a great start with your selfies, Susan!

[For the murals/wall art, no, no rules at all! So join. I share your enthusiasm for public art. I am hoping that someone will post a linky one day. :-) ]

Rosie said...

What a great start, Susan! You absolutely speak my mind...! ;-) I also finished a 365 last year which I had started on May 23rd 2010. I thought of joining the 52 project, too, but I find I'm having difficulties with prompts and now I just decided to take it easy and try to at least blog on a regular basis. Thanks so much for you wonderful words on my post last week - it has helped me a lot!

Nancy @ A Rural Journal said...

No word for me this year either. I doubt I would remember the word by March, anyway.

I'm actually trying to decrease the number of challenges I participate in this year -- gets rather "hairy." :) Great post!

RainCityGirl said...

I'm likin your attitude. it works and you are correct... start when it feels right.
Speaking of which. I hope you join us over at FILM26. If you don't have a film camera - I picked up one at GoodWill for $5.99 - jus sayin.