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Thursday, January 2, 2014

Photo Heart

Kat's PHC link up hasn't shown up yet, which means either I missed the memo about it being cancelled this month, or she's running late, which is very un-Kat-like or something is up.  Meanwhile I got this done is a super timely manner (on 1/1/14) , so I'm going to post it now, and link up later if I see the meme in the reader.



Linking with Kat for Photo Heart Connection-last of the 2013 edition.  Praying it goes on to 2014.  It's not only a practice, it's a positive addiction.




Orange
Orange



This month was tough; really tough to choose a photo my heart connected with.  Frankly, in looking thru my images, I didn't feel very connected to any of them.  Photo Heart Dis-connection anyone?


I guess it's most important to be connected to yourself.  Kind of like I used to tell my first grade students-it's hard to make friends if you don't like yourself first.  Geez-I need to give myself my own advice sometimes.  That whole everything you need to know you learned in kindergarten book may have a point.

So....here I am connecting to myself.  I do like taking selfies.  I share only the ones that satisfy, but each time I shoot some there are always a bunch-many deletes, and many that just hang in the files.  I suppose in taking them I'm looking to figure out "who am I"?  I can't speak for anyone else, but I still haven't a clue.  Part of that is losing my career-my passion with music.  I'm trying to re-invent myself without music as the driving force.  It's hard.  My mama used to dance with me in the living room when I was little.  Music was always "the" passion.  This re-inventing is taking a long time.

I don't know what I'm saying other than....I'm still searching.  I think maybe life is a continual search.  I'm not sure we ever figure it out.  I am learning/accepting that I am doubly blessed.  Once with the ability, or gift of musicianship, and again with  "an eye"...the one that people keep telling me I have.  I know it's a gift.  I can hone that gift and work to make it better, but there are many times intuition takes over.  Being the most non-religious person I know, I do know and appreciate that God is smiling on me....that my "eye" intuition is a gift.

Yah.  So this month I'm connecting to me-on the empty fishing docks-on Christmas Eve, alone in the setting sun, getting my head swiveled toward this rusty retaining wall of orange, drenched in warm light, totally unexpectedly....yah, that's what I'm connecting with.

Thank you to all those who PHC with me.  Extra special thanks to Kat for hostessing such a great meme.



13 comments:

Tamar SB said...

This was gorgeous, Susan. You are really so profound and deep.

Sarah Huizenga said...

She is traveling right now so she said the link might not be up until the 4th or 5th.

Sarah Huizenga said...

Susan- this is such a special heart felt, soul baring post. You have been given a second gift with your creative eye, don't fight it, it may lead you right where you are meant to be. I feel that creative talents are given as gifts and should never be wasted. I heard that message too many times in 2013 to ignore it any more :)

Sarah Huizenga said...

Susan- this is such a special heart felt, soul baring post. You have been given a second gift with your creative eye, don't fight it, it may lead you right where you are meant to be. I feel that creative talents are given as gifts and should never be wasted. I heard that message too many times in 2013 to ignore it any more :)

Wayne (Woody), whatever said...

Your words are most inspirational, thank you for sharing. You are hearing with your eyes and doing a damn fine job of it.

Cathy H. said...

This is a fantastic self-portrait; wonderful background! I can't even bein to imagine what it's like to lose your passion as you have! I admire your ability to move forward and develop your other gifts. Yes, you have a wonderful gift for photography!

gina said...

This post is very moving, Susan, because you are so honest. You managed to find warmth and bright color in the midst of winter and put yourself in it......that's significant. Yes, you have an amazing eye and you are also so expressive in writing too. Use these wonderful gifts you have now -- as Sarah said, talents should not be wasted.

bgottsab said...

Oh, yes - I am definitely still trying to figure things out. It often feels like everyone else knows what they are doing and I'm the only one without a clue. So it is good to know that I have company in the uncertainty.

Love this selfie - it looks like you are standing in front of an orange curtain - taking the stage for your starring role, perhaps? You do have a gift - thank you for sharing it with us.

Deborah Tisch said...

I'm grateful that you share your gift with all of us. I'm inspired.

Leanne Barnett said...

This is a great shot, love the orange, it does look like a curtain or something that is moving. I think everyone is on a journey- sometimes feeling certain of what we should be doing other times floating along & being unsure. I guess the trick is to enjoy the ride wherever we are :)

Maria Ontiveros said...

Love what you wrote, and I was happy to hear that Kat is planning to continue the practice.
Rinda

Kat Sloma said...

I guess you didn't get the memo in the form of my newsletter - yeah, I was out of town on the first and posted late, as you notices. :) I'm glad you went ahead, completed the practice, and posted anyway! That's what a practice is all about, and internal desire.

Your PHC posts always touch me and make me think, Susan. Your words resonate with me. I think we are all trying to figure ourselves out. If we are lucky, along this journey of life we figure out a few key things. One of the ones I'm figuring out is the only constant is change. And you have a change you are adapting to that is bigger than most. I'm glad you have photography to help you on this journey. Wonderful PHC.

seabluelens said...

I don't know how it happens, but your posts often make me want to laugh and cry at the same time. "I think maybe life is a continual search." I'm pretty sure that's right. I'm collecting social security now and still haven't figured out what I'm supposed to be doing with my life. So, connecting with yourself. Recognizing you have more than one gift. That's good. The rest will come.